Argentina in Film- Concluded?

I'm going to have to admit, this post has been sitting as draft for the past week. Somehow, I combined my memories of Thursday and Friday together and when I realized what I had done it was a giant mess. I've been trying to figure out what pictures go where, so if it's not exactly perfect you'll have to excuse me.

But hey, most of you wouldn't know the difference anyway, right?

When I last left you, we had just spent our second night in San Antonio de las Nowhere. After a cigar smoke filled discussion the night before, we ventured our way back into civilization- but not before visiting the Tren de las Nubes.

Here's how we spent our Thanksgiving Day.

Prior to leaving for The Train to the Clouds, we made a stop at the special education school that we visited the day before to purchase some arts and crafts made by the students.



View from the top (via Kevin's disposable).


My view from the bottom.


Wasn't feeling too well, so I decided to sit on a swing with Court.


On the long ride (4+ hours) back to Salta, I had about 22 minutes of America.


Then it was a mini pit stop to pick up a milanesa sandwich. While we were waiting, the llama lady and llama daughter came by and we bought up all of her goods.


Here's where I stray off course and use digital pictures for story continuity. But hey, I'm sure you don't care, do you?

After the freakishly long and nauseous ride home, all I was craving was a hamburger. To my surprise, Pepe had our driver pull over at a stand.

These are all the sauces they had.


And poor Kevin thought that "todos," meant only mustard and ketchup. Sadly, it was all of the aforementioned condiments.


Luckily mine only had chimichurri.


After a re-check-in at the hotel we stayed at a few days ago (you should have seen the look on some of the hotel guest faces when we dropped our bags off)...


..it was time to see the town.


As European looking as it was in Argentina...


...yeah, I didn't get it either.


They really, really love the 80's here.


Are we in a freaking Coldplay video?


OK, in addition to Thanksgiving, it was also Dolly's birthday. After Lauren and I picked up a birthday cake, Pepe and I fashioned a birthday crown out of a box of wine and some tinsel I bought at the store.

All hail King Pepe.


The coronation ceremony.


Queen Dolly reading a note that Pepe handed to her. Unfortunately, we couldn't read or write so whatever is in the message is forever lost in translation.


Pepe: Moveable printed type, we must keep this from the serfs lest they gain literacy and threaten the Landed Gentry.
Us:What do u have there me lord?
Pepe: Nothing! Back to your turnips.

Our turnips.


Cake blowing ceremony.


Although I would have preferred a turkey over filet mignon, having some choice meat with some choice people made it a Thanksgiving to never forget.


After dinner, we did what everyone does after Thanksgiving dinner...

We went back up to the room and watched 80's music videos over glasses of delicious, delicious wine.


Now I know I said I'd wrap it up in this post, but there are waaaaay too many pictures to leave out. So, it looks like there will indeed be the conclusion to the conclusion posted sometime later this week. Trust me, you're not going to want to miss it. What's it like when you're giving away shoes and a mob of people surround you? You'll see.

So again, I'm sorry it's taken so long to finish this- you've got my sincerest apologies. But hey, then again, you probably don't mind.

Do you?

Don We Now Our Gay Apparel

It's that time of year when we pull out those corny Christmas sweaters that grandma gave and wear them to holiday socials. Last evening was the 15th Annual Tavoda Cookie Party, and it gets better every year.

Our lovely host, Andrea.


Like I mentioned yesterday, I'm hacking up a storm. Here was my saving grace for the evening.


Why hire a bartender when a robot can shake your martinis?


The ultimate man-cave. I know you can't see it, but it's got two plasma TV's, bbq, couches, patio heaters, wood decks- the whole nine yards. It's where all the boys went to complain about their wives.


Alright, now it's time to get to the cookie spread. Check out these creations.




After decorating The Bear Den cookie..


I noticed it bore resemblance to that teacher from Daria with the freaked out eye.


For every cookie I make, I eat. One for one.


And of course, I had to show love to my TOMS family. Sorry, but the icing sorta ran out and I had to spread it thin.


What better way to wash down cookies than with egg nog? Splash of rum? Cinnamon sprinkles? Pellegrino? Additional, unnecessary question mark?


Monkeys and candy canes a-plenty.


Did I mention that Andrea had a 21 year old cat named Axel? Poor guy's got bad joints, but refuses to die. Gotta love that steadfast, unfaltering determination.


The cookie party is also a book giving party, where Andrea (and family) picks out a book according to your personality.


My book?


STOKED!

Argentina 4 tomorrow. Get amped.

Devotedly Yours,
j

Happy Birthdays!

As I try to finish up the Argentina Film post, I'm going to leave you with a few birthday wishes to some good people.

Big Kev aka The Gum Man- Happy 38th!


Courtneypoo aka The Court of Law- Happy 21st!


Geoffers aka Milkbone- Happy Quarter of a Century!


Kate aka The Hulk- Happy 22nd! Gosh, I can't believe you're 22.


Happy Birthday friends! Seems like there's a lot of birthdays in the month of December...which makes late March and early April- well, never mind. Hope you make it a good one!

Alright, I'm off to the famous Cookie Party. Recap on that tomorrow, Argentina 4 on Monday.

Ace, thanks for the remedy. Now I'm blitzed on bourbon and honey with Vicks Vaporub in my nostrils. PS, Ace fans- get ready for the ultimate Ace post.

Devotedly Yours,

j

Argentina in Film, Installment Three

Here is part three of the film pictures I was able to take in Argentina. When I last left you, we had just arrived into Salta and spent our first night. The following morning was nothing we could ever expect.

Pepe was very adamant about keeping our itineraries as secret as possible. All we knew was that our group of 10 had to be split in two 4x4's on a long drive through the mountains. Exactly how long was never told to us, but hey, this is what we were expecting, right?

Wrong.

What was first rocky, uneven roads turned into unpaved, narrow dirt roads harrowing over cliffs.

What was first three hours turned into six, six into seven, and- well, you get the picture.

Our first stop on our way to Tolar Grande was a small town called San Antonio de los Cobres. At this point I believe it had just been a bit over three hours, and Pepe still wouldn't tell us how long the rest of the way was. To get a picture of how remote this place was, I read somewhere that back in the 19th century, anyone born in the area could claim Bolivian, Chilean or Argentinean citizenship, according to his preferences.

Is that remote enough for you? What's crazy is that it wasn't even our final destination. But we'll get to there in a minute.

It's here where the people start looking more indigenous than their relatives in Buenos Aires.


Courtneypoo trying to shake off the stiffness. Our truck had to fit four in the back, with only room for three. Needless to say we were that much closer to permanent scoliosis.


Even after hours of torture, Rach manages to put on a smile. Precious.


OK I hate having to include this because it isn't film, but just to hammer the point home here was a stop about an hour and a half outside of Tolar Grande (and about another two and a half hours from the stop in San Antonio de los Nowhere).


Hours later, we finally get there. None of us are really sure how long it actually took because we were all asleep at one point or another on the drive. I don't think we wanted to know.

Surprisingly, the flag flies in the middle of nowhere just as well as it does in Buenos Aires. Astonishing.


Tolar Grande was originally just a temporary town, but as you can see it ended up staying awhile.


Check out this video and you'll catch a glimpse of where we were.


Back at the school we fit the children with their new TOMS, and played a game of Duck, Duck, Goose.


After it was all said and done, it was time for the grueling trek back to San Antonio de los Cobres where we were spending the next two nights. Normally this plate would cheer me up, but by then I was so drained I couldn't even laugh that we were served a carrot salad, garnished with tomatoes.


I think our looks sell the story.


If these TOMS look exhausted to you, you're right. They are.


My beloved leather bag was plenty exhausted, too. It also got ravaged with Mars dirt on the drive over. Actually, everyone's bags did.


The next day was brutal for me. The altitude had dehydrated me and gave me the worst headache I've ever had. After a handful of Tylenol and a few cups of Coca Leaf tea, it was off to drop shoes.



First stop- biggest group yet.





Pepe getting interviewed.


Mate = Thank God.




Next stop was at a school that also had room and board for kids who were from out of town (at least that's what I remember hearing, it could have been some sort of foster school or orphanage).



Whatever it was, they had their Christmastime decorations up.


It was also here where we were served the ultimate meat dish. Most of the girls couldn't finish it, so Big Kev ended up on garbage disposal duty. The dessert following was served in a giant cauldron with contents very closely resembling gruel.

After lunch, it was TOMS Shoes time!




My buddy Gustavo posing with my travel gnome Rupert.


As we were pulling up to the school, we all wanted to slide down the giant red slide- until we saw that it was mangled at the bottom with broken pieces of wood and nail spewing all over.


Obviously our fear means nothing to these beautiful kids. No matter what, they'll find a positive out of anything.


After the drops, it was back to the hotel where I was tricked to climb a mountain with a few members of the team. The others wisely slept. [warning: not film! sorry!]






I couldn't help it. Sorry.


Later that night we had dinner which was home to some of the largest Coke's in glass bottles I've ever seen. (Actually, they're all over Argentina.)


Then, to appease Dolly's wishes, we went shopping for a bit. Stuffed armadillos, anyone? Anyone?


I know it's a longshot, but listen up. Peace still works. Period.


Part Four, coming soon.

[editors note: i'm in vegas until tuesday, so the continuation of this post will most likely be on wednesday. after all, we're in town for this, and there is serious work to be done- aka convince tony reagins to re-sign mark teixeira. ps, i added a twitter sidebar (it's to the right of the blog) so you can follow our minute-by-minute stalking of angels brass, looming over their every move, pressuring them to sign free agents we most desperately need.]

[editors note in response to above editors note: i know. i sound crazy. but i've been baseball-less for months now. i need sustenance. this video isn't cutting it anymore.]